Makes Me Wanna Holler

Matthew 5:21-26

 

In the early morning hours of April 15th, 1912, the ship of which it was said not even God could sink, sank.  The culprit that lead to the demise of the Titanic was an iceberg.  It is said that when it floats we can only see about 9% of an iceberg; the other 91% is hidden well beneath the surface.  In other words, for ships like the Titanic, the real danger when it comes to an iceberg, is not what you see above the surface, it’s what lies beneath.

 

As we come to our text this morning this is how Jesus juxtapositions murder and anger.  While physical murder is the tip of the iceberg, what lies beneath the surface fueling the act is anger.  Notice that Jesus does not concentrate his efforts on the tip of the iceberg, but instead diverts our attention to what lies beneath the surface, and that is anger.  In other words, Jesus is not just concerned with the physical, seen behavior.  Rather, Jesus hones in on the heart and what fuels the behavior.  One scholar poignantly articulates this truth when he claims, “To ‘fulfill all righteousness’ and to have a ‘righteousness that surpasses the scribes and Pharisees,’ disciples must face the issue of the inner person.  Not committing the physical act of murder is good and right, of course, but it is not the true litmus test of piety and alignment with God’s nature, will, and coming kingdom; examining one’s attitudes and speech are just as important as refraining from homicidal violence”- Joseph Pennington. 

 

Creating the Need

And it’s here where we are all found guilty.  While most of us in this room have not committed the physical act of murder, who here is blameless when it comes to unrighteous anger?  Many of us know the shame that comes moments after we have had an outburst where we have raised our voice, shouted and even cursed someone.  What parent is there who hasn’t played back the tapes of a recent episode with your child in which you’ve wondered did I go too far with my anger?  How many of us wish we could retrieve that anger laced text message or email filled with capital letters and cruel emojis, moments after we sent it?  When it comes to unrighteous anger we are all guilty, yes, even Christians!

 

I was reminded of this a few weeks ago as I was driving to preach at a church in Florida.  I don’t know, maybe I wasn’t paying attention, but whatever I did I ticked the driver off who zoomed in front of me and gave me the middle finger.  I was ticked, but praise God, I didn’t respond.  But wouldn’t you know it, a few moments later I found myself making a right turn behind this driver onto the church parking lot.  And to be snarky, I parked close to him in the church parking lot!  I said, “How are you doing, brother”?  He didn’t acknowledge me.  And boy, I wish I could’ve seen his face when I got up to preach!  Christians struggle with unrighteous anger too!  We know this not only from experience, but notice in our text on unrighteous anger, Jesus keeps using the term brother- a reference to the people of God. 

 

ANGER DEFINED

But before we can dive head first into this teaching of Jesus, we need to ask the question, “Is all anger wrong?”  And I would quickly say no.  Part of the reason we know this is what Paul says to the Ephesians, “Be angry and do not sin”- Ephesians 4:26.  Okay, there it is- Paul is showing us that it is possible to have what we would call a righteous anger, which is a kind of anger that does not sin.  We see this after all modeled to us by God and Jesus.  Read the Scriptures and we see God getting angry.  When leaders rebel against Moses, God’s anger is triggered.  When Moses’ brother and sister go in on him for being married to a black woman God’s anger is aroused.  When his people sin, God is not indifferent, he’s angry, this is why Paul says that prior to coming to Jesus we were objects of God’s wrath.  Not only that, but we see Jesus getting angry as he cleanses the temple.  Now both God and Jesus are holy, which means perfectly pure.  And if they are holy and angry at the same time, then we know that anger is not a sin.

 

This now leads to the question, though, what exactly is anger?  Gary Chapman proves helpful when he defines it this way, “Anger, then, is the emotion that arises whenever we encounter what we perceive to be wrong.  The emotional, physiological, and cognitive dimensions of anger leap to the front burner of our experience when we encounter injustice”- Gary Chapman, Anger: Taming a Powerful Emotion.  In other words, anger is a gift, modeled and designed by God to motivate you and I to take positive action when we encounter injustice.  Can you imagine if there wasn’t anger at all?  Slavery would still exist.  All forms of oppression would run rampant.  Injustice would be the norm.  We need anger to combat injustice.  You should get angry over the Harvey Weinstein’s of the world and all the sexism.  You should be angry over racism.  Seeing the poor priced out of their homes should make us angry.  Oppression should make us angry.  And when we get angry over injustice we actually look like God.  And yet to be indifferent over injustice is not to be godly, but to be godless. 

 

And yet the key word in Dr. Chapman’s definition of anger is perceived.  There are a lot of times when what we perceive to be an injustice is wrong, and our misperception leads to unrighteous anger.  When our son Myles was a little boy he loved Lucky Charms.  He had to be about six years old when one morning he came downstairs to eat another bowl of Lucky Charms, when to his shock it was all gone.  He inquired as to who ate the rest of the Lucky Charms, and discovered his little brother Jaden did.  Now it’s at this point where Myles is perceiving an injustice on par with Bernie Madeoff.  So he says quite calmly, “When I get home Jaden, I’m punching you in your face.”  And sure enough when he came home that’s exactly what he did.  And his unrighteous anger triggered my righteous anger, and there were some consequences. 

 

But Lucky Charms aside, I think all of us can relate.  We all have gotten angry over stuff we shouldn’t get angry over.  We lose it because our spouse is, yet again, late for an event we didn’t want to go to in the first place.  We get furious when our roommate drinks the last of the orange juice that we paid for.  And we sulk and brood and stew in anger over not just criticism, but constructive and true criticism.  Yeh, we all have our own Lucky Charms. 

 

ERUPTERS- Matthew 5:21-22

Our text is all about unrighteous anger, and if I could sum up Jesus’ teaching in a sentence I would say that Jesus is clear: Unrighteous anger is relational murder.  Now, I want you to see that Jesus never tells us what triggered the expressions of unrighteous anger.  The person may have called them a racially insensitive term, or talked about their mother, or gave them the finger on the highway, or slammed into their car.  But it’s almost like Jesus is saying none of that really matters.  I’m more concerned with how you respond to the real or perceived injustice. 

 

Not only that, but please notice carefully that Jesus deals with two major categories or expressions of unrighteous anger: Erupters and Stuffers (I know I’ve made up a word).  That’s right, when it comes to unrighteous anger there’s two kinds of people in this room right now- erupters and stuffers.  Jesus first deals with the erupters in verses 21-22 of our text.  Notice in this first episode that Jesus connects anger to speech.  A person gets filled with anger and expresses it in sinful way through their words.  They insult.  They say you fool.  These words- insult and fool- mean to tear down with contempt.  The erupter gets angry and gets this look and says things like, “You’re so dumb.  How could you!  Are you for real right now, we’ve talked about this forever and you still don’t get it.  You’re just like your father!  You’ll never amount to anything”.  And what’s the result of all this erupting?  Well, the person on the receiving in has their confidence and esteem and character murdered.  Yep, unrighteous anger is relational murder.

 

Some years ago a film came out based on a true story called, Antwone Fisher.  Antwone grew up in the foster care system of Cleveland, Ohio.  His foster mother was an erupter.  She beat him mercilessly, called him names not appropriate for me to repeat.  She demeaned him telling him he’d be nothing, and completely tore him down.  And what do we see of him years later?  He’s a picture of zero confidence.  He doesn’t know how to relate to women.  He’s sheepish in general around people and is just beat down.  What’s more is that he’s an erupter himself, always getting into fights.  It really is true what they say: Anger begets anger.

 

And that’s some of you.  You beat people down with your words.  With your tongue you dismantle their confidence and pillage them of all semblance of esteem.  There’s a price that person you cursed out will have to pay.  The child you shook and screamed at will spend years of their life trying to get their emotional bearings back.  The old girlfriend or ex wife you just tore down, will probably spend forever trying to get built back up.  Erupters kill.  They kill confidence, esteem, character and relationships.  They kill God’s children.

 

STUFFERS- Matthew 5:23-24

I love how Jesus approaches anger.  In the opening verses he deals with the person who has been offended, whose been triggered and their volcanic response.  Now Jesus slides to the other side of the table to the person whose done the offending.  Again, we don’t know what the issue is, but the picture is poignant.  Here’s a man who we might say has gotten up early on a Sunday morning.  He had his cup of coffee, read his bible and said his prayers and is now at church.  He’s lifted his hands in praise and sung about how much he loves God.  Now it’s the meet and greet time where he takes out his check and is walking to the giving box.  And won’t you know it that on his way he remembers someone whose not speaking to him; someone whom he’s offended.  Now, I know I’ve taken some poetic license but this is only a modern retelling of Jesus’ words in our text.  But what’s clear is the fact that the offender remembers someone is angry with him tells us that the person who is angry in all likelihood never expressed it to this person.  They just stuffed their anger.  They withdrew.  We can label this person “Brother Stuffer”.  And that’s some of you.  You get triggered and offended and you just stuff and stuff.  You act like everything is okay, but it’s not.  You emotionally withdraw.  Just like the erupter you murder relationships, but not in a loud volcanic way.  No, you’re too cool for that.  You’re more of a silent assassin.

 

I have an acquaintance of mine who grew up in a home filled with erupters.  Conflict was all over the place.  His parents screamed, shouted, cussed and fussed.  At times they even fought physically.  At some point as a little boy he said all conflict is wrong, so I’ll never express anything that might trigger it.  He became a stuffer.  When it comes to his feelings and anger, he’s emotionally constipated.  I’ve watched him go through two divorces, in part, because he never really expressed all of who he was.  When it came to his emotions and anger it was as if there was this maze of police yellow caution tape.  You could never really get too close to him.  He’s emotionally walled off.  That’s how stuffers roll. 

 

And that’s some of you right now.  You could be ticked off but all you say is, I’m fine.  I’m fine.  I’m fine.  You stuff.  But like constipation, it will come out at some point.  Stuffers don’t love anyone but themselves.  How could they really love?  They’re too busy protecting themselves.  Stuffers are silent killers.  C.S. Lewis says, “To love at all is to be vulnerable.  Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken.  If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal.  Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements.  Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness.  But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change.  It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable.  To love is to be vulnerable”- C.S. Lewis. 

 

RECONCILERS- Matthew 5:25-26

Okay, so what’s the path forward?  We know erupters are wrong, and so are stuffers.  But we also know that anger is not wrong, it’s how we handle it.  So how should we handle anger?  Jesus gives us a third way, the way of the reconciler. 

 

Our text ends on a very curious note- two people, the offender and the offended, going to court.  I remember reading this and being like, Huh?  How did we get from church to going to court?  What’s up with this, Jesus?  Well, the court and judge is an end times picture for you and I of what is going to happen to all of us. We are all going to stand before God and have to give an account.  And because we don’t know exactly when that will be, Jesus is urging us to come to terms quickly with those we are at odds with.  He wants us to keep short accounts relationally.  And instead of erupting or stuffing, Jesus wants us to be reconcilers.  See, here’s how you know the difference between unrighteous and righteous anger: Unrighteous anger pushes us away.  Righteous anger draws us close in reconciliation. 

 

My father is the best I’ve seen at stewarding anger.  When we were kids and we would do something that would tick him off, the first thing dad would often do would be to grab his cap, and go outside on a prayer walk.  And the longer the walk the more in trouble we knew we were because dad was working through a lot of anger.  By the time he would come back into the house, he’d have us go into the bedroom.  He’d pull out his bible and read a whole chapter of proverbs to us that dealt with our foolish behavior, and sometimes at the end of that he’d let us slide.  Other times there would be discipline, but he was never out of control, and he always worked hard to communicate he loved us. Instead of his anger pushing us away, and drew us close in reconciliation.

 

GOSPEL CONCLUSION

Well, the bible has news for us, prior to coming to Christ God was angry with us.  Ephesians 2 says we were objects of his wrath.  And I praise God that God was not an erupter!  Had he been an erupter we would have been consumed.  But I also praise God that God is not a suffer, for had he not dealt with the issue of our sin we would have been headed to hell.  Instead, God in Christ became our reconciler.  “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation.  The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.  All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation; that is, in Christ God was reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation”- 2 Corinthians 5:17-19.

 

Call for Salvation/Reconcile Relationships